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Comments on Friday 1 November 2002:
Halloween yesterday. My wife was putting out a bowl full of lollies, to prevent people knocking. "The first lot of kids will just take them all," I said. "I don't care," she said. "Then why not just not put out a bowl of lollies?" "It's to stop people knocking." "But it will only stop the first lot." It was even more spectacularly crap than I expected; the first lot of kids took not just the lollies, but the bowl too. And then more kids came knocking. How can one reach the age of 25 without realising that children are little fucking thieving shitheads who should all be stabbed in the face with rusty blades? We've had mail stolen from our doorstep by kids; how can one expect candy, left out for kids, to not be so treated, in light of that? [10:50]

Kyrin
Oddly enough, I had the exact conversation with a friend of mine last night, whilst we was all headin out. Told em kid's take the candy and the Bowl.
Kids are like raccoons when it comes to candy.

Chris
Its not that kids are shitheads, its that they are opportunistic and smart. If you are nice to them they will be nice in return.

Mike
I disagree with Chris Children are shitheads. they should be crate-trained.

Mike
Please pardon my absent period between "Chris" and "Children".

RavenBlack
Good one, Chris. "If you are nice to them...", for example, by leaving out a bowl of lollies, "they will be nice in return", for example, by stealing your stuff. Very sage advice.

Digi
Was there a sign on the bowl saying "Please take only a few", or the like? If not, it seems reasonable to me for them to just take the lot without shityness.

RavenBlack
Reasonable for them to take the bowl too? Are things left on doorsteps assumed to be "please steal me", then?

Steve
Yeah, leaving a bowl out was a bad idea to begin with...
There should also be a law that your not allowed to go trick or treating after you reach a certain age. There were kids with real beards comming up to my door....

RavenBlack
Did they have guns, too? "Make my treat a VCR, or the trick'll be to turn you into a sieve!"

Digi
No, taking the bowl was not reasonable. In my view anyway. However kids steal bowls on Hallwoeen, it's the sort of thing they do. If you'd left a dead chicken on the step, a fox would have stolen it. Plus it would have made great halloween decoration. The point being that it's their nature, it doesn't make them bad. There's a proverb about this somewhere. If your looking to assign blame then in my view it rests with the person who knew it would probably get stolen, and yet still put it out. As for children being shits; I think it's more that they're like normal people but without that bloody hypocritical sense of ethics. It's a silly point of me to make when I have so much work to do.

RavenBlack
"As for children being shits; I think it's more that they're like normal people"...

The two phrases are synonymous.

Digi
Yes, fair point. What I meant was "As for children being greater shits than normal people..."

Nik
Gah. Digi, I used to have a sort of pseudo-respect for you.

CobaltBarncat
Kids will be kids. They like to test the limits of their dailydiscovered lives and have fun. As for stabbing hem with rusty razors, lol<\/A>/, HAHAHAHAHA!

Digi
What is it you know disrespect Nik? Please tell me no one told about the way I like to lisen to the ocational Britney track? Err.. not that I do you understand.

Nameless
[Question]
How can one reach the age of 25 without realising that children are little fucking thieving shitheads who should all be stabbed in the face with rusty blades?

[Answer]
By having one.

Kanada Ten
T'was me. Sorry.

C. Copperpot
Bah, just little idiots trying to be funny. Happens all too often, especially when children aren't taught to respect their elders very well.

Penny Chew
A freind asked what asked I was doing for Halloween. I replied "Taping up the letter box and shutting the curtains." One of the more sensible options I feel.

SpasmodicMonk
Are you sure that rusty blades are sufficient? I would have thought that coating the lollies (or even better, the bowl) in some form of extremely potent, slow acting poison would be more appropriate.

Tyrethali
It's all due to lack of proper rites of passage and solidarity in society today. Children don't get that sense of belonging these rites impart, and they thus don't like they have to take part in society's rules. All you people with kids bring back ritual mutilation today.

PunkRockrChick
iight...listen up people...everyone say this with me...

LOLLIPOPS
MAILBOX
IT WAS

and 'bloody' is not an adjective used to describe everyday objects. 'bloody' is used to describe things that are actually bloody...fuckin retarded brits...

Boo
Is it possible to become a master vampire? And if so then how do you become one?

Digi
An angry American once told my dad "If it wernt for us ya'll'd be speakin german!". My father reminded him "Without us you wouldn't be speaking at all. We can but dream."

Mary
I'm sorry about the bowl and candy. But not all of us are shitheads. (Or when you said children, did you mean younger than 14? ^^;)

I think it's just people in general. Some kids are "saints", some quite the opposite. And I know plenty of adults who are great, and some who are assholes(take my dad for example).

Besides, if you need to next year, swords can be bought quite cheap. I had mine out and was polishing it when I was helping Mom pass out candy. :P

RavenBlack
There were even weapons to hand, and my wife saw the kids stealing stuff. It would have been a perfect opportunity for a shit-scaring.

I didn't say *all* children are thieving shitheads. I think it's a fair comment on children as a group.

Mary
I understand.

When I moved, we had a box of frozen ices in our driveway. The kids across the street "found" them and were taking them to their house when we came back outside, so I guess I can sympathize with that.

Again, I'm sorry about your bowl. People shouldn't just take other people's stuff just because it's there.

By the way, I like your art. :)

Nameless
lol<\/A>/

mvo
Kids are like gremlins. All cute and nice until they gain in size. Then, before you know it, these people will have infiltrated every level of government. Then .. I don't know. Maybe they will bomb Iraq. They must have some master plan.

C. Copperpot
You left out one detail, mvo -- whatever you do, don't get them wet!

Tom
So mvo, you say that kids are all cute and nice until they gain in size. Essentially, until they grow up and become adults, also known as big fucking thieving shitheads who should all be stabbed in the face with rusty blades. Who are not to be trusted with even a measly <b> tag.

SOD
couldn't ya just have left your porch light off?

RavenBlack
Preaching to the choir.

Tabbie
Hehe, we actually used the opportunity to get rid of some candy that we had bought last year after Halloween. I saw these neat looking lollypops that are black skulls and turn your tongue bright red. After a year, no one had eaten any of them. I didn't remember that there were going to be trick or treaters out (I'm not usually at home on that night) so I was caught off guard when the first ones came up. I opted to give them the lollies instead of the Orange and Black Nerds from 3 Halloweens ago... I really need to throw some of this stuff out..... : )

Tabbie
Then we turned the porch light off and left. It was fun for about the 45 minutes that I was home and giving out candy, but then again I like silly holidays....

Callisto22
I agree that kids can be rotten little buggers but they all are evil. It what they are taught by parents and their friends. I'm sorry about your bowl too. I hope you and your wife have a jolly bunch of kids of your own. Maybe you can teach yours not to steal and the world will be better for it.

Callisto22
They all aren't evil ,I mean. :)

Zloduska
Why bother going to the trouble of stabbing kids in the face with rusty razor blades when you can simply put them inside the candy once a year?

khaos64
kids are a reflecction of generation b4 them. they only act out what they have seen or heard.

RavenBlack
And we all live in caves and hunt with pointy sticks.
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