Archive February 2007

Oh Mormons, why do you all look so funny? Why do you have such silly ways?

I answer the door in a dressing gown.
"We understand this might be a bad time, but we're bla bla Jesus Christ of bla bla bla."
"You can imagine how interested I am, can't you?"
"Well..."
"Oh go on, you could take a pretty good guess."
"Um, are you interested in more peace in this life?"
"No thanks, I already have plenty."
"You're not interested in more peace?" (incredulously)
"Well, I could have more peace if you don't come back."
"Wait, hold on a minute, we're..." (door is closed)

[20:49] [5 comments]

Wednesday 14 February 2007

A horrible puzzle! Find the four numbers which, using only the basic mathematical operators (addition, subtraction, multiplication and division) and each number once (or not at all), can make all the positive integers up to the highest possible value of n.

Explaining by example, if the question was to do this for only two numbers, the answer would be, unless I'm mistaken, 3 and 1, with n=4, thus:

1 = 1
2 = 3-1
3 = 3
4 = 3+1

3 and 2 would be no good since, though it can make 5 (3+2) and 6 (3*2), it can't make 4, meaning its n stops at 3.

Answer in comments with any answers that beat the previous best answer. For a quick guess starting point to beat, take 1, 3, 9 and 18, which make for an n of 31. Alternatively, if you can't beat a previous answer, you could challenge it on an integer of n or less that you think it can't make. [01:36] [4 comments]

Monday 12 February 2007

In Sheffield there is a place which says "turn right through arch for ancient wisdom". Even though I am aware that it's some sort of horrible candles and incense shop, I find it tempting because, well, it's obviously a significant plot element to the game. But on the other hand it might well be a trap - if I make a computer RPG, I have resolved that all obvious plot-forcing messages will be traps. A "turn right for ancient wisdom" sign will have been put there by bandits, covering up a sign that says "don't turn right, you'll get mugged." And this is what I now believe the shop really is. (At the end of my imaginary game you start getting good directions that you'll no longer trust.)

There is also a pub called the Horse and Groom. I peered hopefully at it, then said "bah, that pub has no logo. I was hoping for a picture of a man marrying a horse."
Ruth replied "a logo? Oh, you mean like a wossname, a shingle?"
"Well," I said, giggling manically as I do when I'm about to make the worst joke in the world again, "he wouldn't be shingle after he married the horsh." [17:15] [2 comments]